Brendon was hoping to hit the headlines today and his drive on the first into Charlie’s bush was indeed the day’s big early news.

Blighty then went one better with a drive that dribbled off the first tee and didn’t even make it to Charlie’s bush.

We really should get a plaque for that bush.

Meanwhile, with third placed Blighty’s form not improving (-6 on the front 9 and -10 for the day) the big heavyweight title fight for the Fred Kitson very soon just had JQ and Craig in the ring punching and counter-punching.

Craig wiped the first even though he had a shot there, while JQ’s 5 for a half saw him extend his lead to 3.

But Old Reliable was soon back in town with a par for a plus on the 2nd, another on the 4th after a great tee shot there, two more on the 7th and 8th and he hit the turn at +3 for the day and +5 overall.

Meanwhile JQ had kept things steady and turned with +1 for the day to match Craig at +5 overall.

Game on!

Ali and Frazier had three big heavyweight fights back in the day, the Fight of the Century at Madison Square Garden in 1971 (Fraser in 15 rounds), Super Fight II in 1974 also at the Garden (which was a bit of a dud, Ali adopting controversial holding/clinching tactics and being lucky to be given the win on points) and 1975’s Thriller in Manilla which is remembered by many as one of the best and most brutal fights in boxing history.

Playing partners Blighty and Michael had the best seats in the house as Craig and JQ went at it over the back 9.

Ivanhoe’s Thriller in Manilla saw both Craig and CJ get themselves out of trouble to salvage great 5’s for half on 10, JQ sinking one of his new trademark 15 foot putts and Craig chipping sideways after being stymied by a tree.

Both parred 11, with Craig making a good up and down there. However with JQ sneaking a shot there off his 14 handicap (and Craig with no shot) it was advantage JQ by one.

The first crack in Craig’s armoury came on 12 when he missed a short par putt. JQ up by two.

Craig bounced back with two great shots into 13 to about 10 feet while JQ had been all over the shop out on the 10th fairway with his second and had left himself a 15 footer down the hill for a half. It was looking for all money like a two shot swing and back to all square but JQ nailed the putt! JQ one up.

Still all square after 14, both fighters hit the green on 15 but faced long putts, 40 feet or so. JQ’s magic putter won the battle there, putting to gimmie distance while Craig 3-putted. JQ by two.

Craig counterpunched again on 16 with two greats shots in there and slotting the 10 footer for birdie. It was a “double plus” that unfortunately for Craig only counted as one. JQ halved 16 and saw his lead back to one.

Off his 14 handicap JQ had a shot on 17 but Craig didn’t. Craig had another 10-15 footer for birdie and it just missed. JQ then had a rare putting blemish missing a short par putt but his 5 a half was enough to keep the lead by 1.

Before heading to the 18th, Michael gently enquired about the state of the contest. Having forgotten that JQ got a shot at 11, Michael had calculated them even, which is probably why he never got invited to score the Ali-Frazer fights.

JQ professed to not know the scores (bullshit thought Michael as they were marking each other’s cards) but Craig clarified that yes JQ was 1 up. With both having a shot on 18, it was a bit tense out there.

Both hit good shots into 18 but they pulled up a fraction short. If Craig could get up and down for par and JQ made a 4, it would be all tied up and a countback would be required (which Craig would have won by the way). If JQ stuffed up and made a 5, Craig would win outright.

But that all became academic when JQ, after hitting a dodgy chip to about 15 feet (his new pet distance with the putter) stepped up and knocked it straight in. Another 15 footer!

Craig, realising the fight was over, then carelessly 3-putted 18 to leave JQ the winner by 3. But that margin belies what a tough, close, high quality knock ’em down drag it out fight it was all day long.

JQ at +6 over the two weeks (+2 this week) and Craig at +3 overall (+1 this week) pummelled the rest of the field, with the best the rest could offer being Michael (-3 overall for 3rd), Steve G and Brendon -7 overall for joint 4th) and Gordo 5th with -8.

Note: when JQ and Craig next saddle up, JQ (14 into 10) will no longer have those cheeky strokes on 6, 9, 11, 17 that a good player like him shouldn’t need. Craig is back in single figures (10 to 9).

In other news of the day, the same driver of Brendon’s that crashed Charlie’s bush on the 1st drove it onto the green at 14, quite an effort considering the tee was about as far back as it can be there. Not to be outdone, SoS nearly drove the 16th green (only problem was the shot was from the 14th tee).

SoS did manage the win the money for a great shot to 1.91 metres on the 12th, while Adam hit it close on the 7th to win the ball there and Michael won the ball on 18.

When it comes to member temper tantrums, Harry can chuck one as good as most, especially when his putts keep rimming the hole. On 17, Harry had another one doing the rimming thing and Gordo was reported to be running for the hills fearing the blowing of the Harry volcano. Luckily the putt did a full 360 and dropped in. “Phew” said Gordo.

Earlier, Gordo had shocked his playing partners with a big long high drive on the 16th, a launching path much higher than his usual low worm burners.

Harry also hit a birdie on the 8th, but it was the feathered kind. Reports suggest no major injury to the bird.

It was great to see Raj come down for the BBQ. He is planning to be back in a fortnight or so and play in a cart for 4-6 weeks and then hopes to be back to normal and walking and playing in 2025.

As always, big thanks to the BBQ chefs and others who pitched in to help with organisation and clean-up. Our BBQ’s are one of the 10 “selling points” in our new club brochure designed to encourage new members to join us.

If you know anybody who might want to join us for the 2025 season and they need a bit of convincing, give them a copy of the brochure (copies available in the clubhouse).

Judging by today, JQ and Craig need some fresh competition.

Results for Saturday, 26 Oct 2024
1st John Quinlan (+4, + 2, + 6) 2nd Craig Cameron (+2, + 1, + 3) 3rd Michael Gourlay (-3, □, -3) 4th Steven Gervasoni (-6, -1, -7) 4th Brendon Mitchell (-5, -2, -7) 5th Gordon Hill (-5, -3, -8)

Seniors Results: 1st Craig Cameron (+2, +1, +3) 2nd Michael Gourlay (-3, □, -3) 3rd Steven Gervasoni (-6, -1, -7)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 12th Stephen O’Sullivan BallPin No 1 – 7th Adam King BallPin No 2 – 18th Michael Gourlay

Johnny Q was all smiles before tee-off for the first round of the 2024 Fred Kitson and even more so post-round.

After an amazing up and down par on the 18th from out near the 9th green, one of many brilliant up and downs during the round, JQ signed for +4 and established himself as the man to beat for one of the club’s most talked about trophies.

While JQ was doing the Pride of Jenni thing out front, Whitey was also looking on the Brightside after a round of +3 for second placing. However with Whitey a no show for Round 2, apparently something to do with a horse race, JQ was a bit disturbed to discover that the next in line, lurking quietly in the sunshine, is Craig at +2.

Apparently in JQ/Old Reliable head to heads over the years, JQ has on occasion come off second best to Craig, so the pressure will be on in the last group for Round 2.

Meanwhile a confident Blighty, after a square card, wasn’t shy in reminding that pair “don’t count me out” and given it is handicap conditions, not weight for age, with Blighty (22) Craig (10) and JQ (14) it will be a good contest down the straight between those three.

The best of the rest of the 14 man field was Porks mate Tim who had -2 off his handicap of 21. This was Tim’s first round after gaining his club handicap and like many a new member over the years (remember when Charles was winning everything) Tim looks very capable of murdering his handicap and having plenty of podium finishes in the near future. It’s not sure whether Tim and Porks (the week’s NAGA at -8) will be starters for Round 2.

The horses further back in the race did their best (worst) to be given the BBQ tongs, with Michael on -3 (highlighted by losses on the last 4 holes) and Brendon, Stan, Gordo and Harry on -5. Steve G is a further shot back at -6, with Dan proving that golf is indeed a funny game with a -7 after he scored the equivalent of +8 on the same handicap the week before.

CJ also managed -7 but perhaps his heart wasn’t in it because he knew he wasn’t going to be around for Round 2. He has a weekend away to celebrate his 60th birthday, enjoy and happy birthday Chris!

A bloke that Tim referred to as Ryan won the Propin on the 4th with a great shot in there, Whitey collected the ball on the 15th and Harry went close to breaking all records for length (11+ metres) for the nearest the pin on 18.

With CJ and Dan non-starters for Round 2 and Porks also contemplating doing a runner to avoid BBQ duties, thankfully there is rumoured to be an influx of BBQ experts turning up for Round 2, including Prez Priems, SoS, Adam and Matty. Also attending the BBQ will be special guest Raj who is on the mend from his broken ankle and looking to get back to playing again before Christmas.

During the week Harry suggested we get in the mode to celebrate “double centuries” this week.

What he was referring to was that Adam will be playing his 100th game with the club this week and SoS his 700th. You can find the game count, with those two highlighted in yellow, in the Handicap Sheet under “Competitions” on the club website.

CJ leads that race with 1,121. Others of note between CJ and SoS are Bobby (952) Targe (917) and Gordo (881). Peps (690) will be next to hit 700 and Harry (582) will hit 600 in 2025 while Brendon (488) is heading to 500.

Results for Saturday, 19 Oct 2024
Leaderboard Round 1: 1st John Quinlan (+4) 2nd Rodney White (+3) 3rd Craig Cameron (+2) 4th Andrew Blight (□) 5th Tim Mathers (-2)

Seniors Leaderboard: 1st Rodney White (+3) 2nd Craig Cameron (+2) 3rd Andrew Blight (□)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 4th Ryan Porker BallPin No 1 – 15th Rodney White BallPin No 2 – 18th Harry Boughen

It was quaddies rather than trifectas on the agenda on the first day at Cobram-Barooga for the big 2024 Mustard Jacket weekend.

With Peps and his mate Paddy on the job, they landed 2 quaddies (Melbourne and Sydney).

Off the back of this success, most of the boys headed to Saturday night dinner in good spirits, even though the quality of golf on the West Course earlier in the day hadn’t been all that brilliant.

Word filtered through from Ivanhoe that Dan had played a blinder (44 points to win the inside comp) which was 10 better than the day one leader (Jake Priems with 34) in the Mustard Jacket contest.

Hot on Jake’s heels was CJ and Zimmer with 32, Steff and Dale with 30 and Geoff and dark horse Paddy on 29.

Defending champion Brent was on 28 and still in touch, joined on that score by his roommates Chris James and Michael.

Of the rest, Gordo’s 18 points was a standout and earned him the honour of donning the new Mustard NAGA guernsey to wear in the first group out on Sunday morning.

However there was plenty of company in the contest for the overall NAGA with Steve G and Prez Priems on 19, Craig on 20, Matty and Josh on 21 and Kenny and Brendon on 22.

Sos and Peps were officially midfield with 24.

As Day 2 unfolded on the “Old Course” a few of the backmarkers were showing some good form with Matty 35 and Craig 34 racing past a few of the more tired horses ahead of them.

But they were too far back to trouble the leaders. Steff was striking the ball beautifully but his putting was letting him down (including twice having eagle putts and three putting for pars).

Soon it was clear it was a three horse race, with Jake, Zimmer and CJ well in front.

By the time they got to the 17th tee, Jake had a 5 shot lead over CJ and it was all over.

Despite only scoring one point in the closing two holes, Jake won by two shots, with a second day 34 for 68, with CJ in second place on 66 after adding 34 to his first round 32. Zimmer on 65 (32, 33) was hot on his heels in third place with Paddy fourth on 59 (29, 30) and Steff fifth on 57 (30, 27).

After taking a while to get a few boys back from the bar and/or cafe and herd everybody around the table and keep them there, Matty announced the winners of all the ancillary prizes (4 x nearest the pins each day) the calcutta for winner and NAGA, and of course the NAGA itself. Gordo was very pleased to pass on the mustard NAGA guernsey to Rob for him to wear on Day 1 next year.

SoS was also given a trophy but I wasn’t entirely sure what for. I think it was meant to be for worst shot of the weekend, which really should have gone to Josh, who manged to hit a hybrid into the ground that popped straight up in the air and then spun backwards on landing and finished behind him.

SoS did hit the shot of the day on Day 2. On the long par 3 third, over the bunker to a clear nearest the pin winner there. Indeed SoS’s front 9 on Day 2 of 18 points was probably the best 9 holes played all weekend, so maybe that’s why he won the trophy.

Finally, with all the other presentations out of the way, last year’s winner Brent put the famous Mustard Jacket on Jake.

While he declined the invitation to make a long victory speech, he gets to wear the Mustard Jacket in the pool room (and bragging rights over CJ) until this time next year when he will start as the man to beat for the jacket in 2025.

CJ will be back again to have another crack and see if he can add to the one time he has won the jacket previously.

Harry’s website doesn’t seem to have a list of Mustard Jacket winners, but rumour is CJ’s win was many moons ago. Stand by for an update after the winner’s names sewn into the jacket are inspected.

Matty has committed to organising again next year and is suggesting there will be a switch to Rich River. I wonder who won the jacket last time it was played at Rich River?

To recap the placings:

Winner – Jake Priems 68 (34, 34)

Runner Up – Chris Priems 66 (32, 34)

NAGA – Rob Priems 36 (19, 17)

Hence the special Priems Trifecta, 1st, 2nd and NAGA.

Third – Zimmer (sorry I don’t know his actual name) 65 (32, 33)

Fourth – the legendary Quaddy Paddy 59 (29, 30). The data suggests Peps might be a better punter with Paddy on board?

Fifth – Steff 57 (30, 27)

Then came:

56 – Matty (21, 35) Chris James (28, 28) Michael (28, 28)

54 – Craig (20, 34)

53 – SoS (24, 29) Brent (28, 25)

52 – Peps (24, 28)

51 – Brendon (22, 29) Geoff (29, 22) and Dale (30, 21)

49 – Steve G (19, 30)

46 – Josh (21, 25)

43 – Gordo (18, 25)

42 – Kenny (22, 20)

36 – Rob (19, 17)

For those of you interested in Club Championship points (really only Michael at this stage as everybody else has lost interest) three of the first five placings in the Mustard Jacket contest (Jake, Zimmer, Paddy) are not official club members, so with points being allocated to club members only, this bumped CJ to first for the points (and the winner’s handicap penalty), Steff to second, Michael and Matty to third, Craig to fourth and Brent and a very gallant SoS collecting a point for fifth.

Meanwhile back at Ivanhoe, there were no points on offer because only four booked and only three turned up, Dan, Harry and Stan. Harry’s report includes that “we could have played in the dark because Dan absolutely shot the lights out.”

Ivanhoe: Just the three of us…..

It was a beautiful day out on the green sward that is Ivanhoe Golf Course. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and the whole world was happy, even if most had decamped to other pastures further north. Unfortunately, only three members could make it to the tees. Targe had some sort of a ‘mechanical’ and his trusty chariot could not make it this far. Either that, or he seriously slept in. Undaunted, Dan, Stan, and Harry played a social round, while endeavouring to score well enough to feature in the results of the ProShop competition. The greenkeepers had done the course proud, with the greens cleaned and nicely manicured for the occasion. The pin placements were mostly giving plenty of green to play with, but a bit of fuzziness in the second cut could easily result in that green needing to be putted across.

As it turned out, we could have finished up playing in the dark, because Dan absolutely ‘shot the lights out’. He started out steadily enough, but then he lit the fuse, and managed to put together five (or was it six) pars in a row to finish the front nine in just one stroke over par, and with 26 points in the results column. The scoring feast was even being broadcast live in England, where Charlie was hanging on every message. The frenetic pace slowed just a little on the back, but he still managed another eighteen points to finish with forty-four of the best. It just so happened that his Club and daily handicap were the same, so he won the ProShop comp, and must have broken the heart of the second place-getter who came home with 43 points. Without a formal comp, the Club handicap did not take the beating that the GA did.

As for Harry and Stan, let’s just say that some things were not kind to their results. Stan suffered from a case of what (for a rightie) would be classified as the ‘shanks’. As a leftie, maybe an over-closed club-face. Still, he did make a bit of a comeback on the second nine, but still fell well short of Dan’s dizzy heights. His last tee shot of the day finished just 2.76m from the pin, which was more than good enough to win the inside ProPin. It was proposed that there should be a nearest-the-pin (anywhere) on the 12th for a couple of dollars each. Stan must have been short of change, because he ‘decided’ that it should be for a cup of coffee. Harry was jubilant when his tee shot headed straight for the pin, and looked to be a hot contender, particularly when Dan and Stan pulled up short. Unfortunately, the ball had run further than anticipated, and Dan was closer, even though he was not on the green. Harry rued not having specified that it had to be on the green! And Stan bought coffee for everyone. Other than that, Harry didn’t mind the number of three putts that he took. What really upset him was the number of short second ones that he missed.

Results for Saturday, 12 Oct 2024
Ivanhoe: No Competition

Challenge: 1st Chris Priems (32, 34, 66) 2nd Stefan Belevski (30, 27, 57) 3rd Michael Gourlay (28, 28, 56) 3rd Matt Hunt (21, 35, 56) 4th Craig Cameron (20, 34, 54) 5th Brent Rowley (28, 25, 53) 5th Stephen O’Sullivan (24, 29, 53)

Seniors Results:
Ivanhoe : No Competition
Challenge: 1st Chris Priems (32, 34, 66) 2nd Matt Hunt (21, 35, 56) 2nd Michael Gourlay (28, 28, 56) 3rd Craig Cameron (20, 34, 54)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – – No Competition BallPin No 1 – – No Competition BallPin No 2 – – No Competition

It was a lucky thing that the potential rain event actually did hold off until the middle of the day. The course management (mis)managed to run out of the fairly solid scorecards that have been handed out for the last few years, and have had to resort to using photocopies instead. Besides offering nothing firm to write on, and being easily subject to puncturing in the process, they would very likely have dissolved had there been even a hint of moisture in the air. Despite this little annoyance, eleven members and Ryan’s mate, Tim, set out to do battle for the October Monthly Medal. After a hiatus of some eleven months, Tim has finally submitted his third card, and will be rearing to get stuck into the competition now that he has a Club handicap to play with. Welcome to the Club, Tim, your name will be added to the registration system so that you can join us next week in our efforts to get enough local players for a formal competition while the rest of the gang go swanning off to do battle with the delights of Cobram, both on and off the course. The course was in pretty good nick, although the gum nuts on some of the greens made for some interesting putts, and some interesting discussion as to whether it would be legal to carry a battery operated blower for the purposes of clearing a path for a putt. The sand coating from last week was somewhat settled in, but there was still enough around to pick up on a damp ball.

The decision about the winner of the Medal was a somewhat fraught affair. On the cards presented, there was a tie for top spot, and the necessary calculations were made to determine the winner by count-back. This seemed to indicate that CJ had beaten Harry by half a stroke on the back nine net basis. And this is where one Senior moment came to light. Harry teed off on the 10th, and cracked a beauty straight down the centre of the fairway. It was only when Stan lined up to follow suit, that it was realised that H had inadvertently teed off from the blue markers. The resultant two stroke penalty appeared to have robbed him of the medal. But, then, there was another Senior moment! CJ had handed in his inside card to the Club and vice versa, meaning that his actual score was 72 and not 70, so Harry did eventually win the Medal. Just goes to show, it pays to concentrate on what you are doing, both on and off the course.

Craig has been described as the metronome of the Club. Tick, tock, tick, tock, down the centre again. Of course, that wasn’t much help when it came to negotiating the gum nuts on the greens, with one example being described as ‘big as a walnut’, and really should have been spotted and cleared from the path. A pretty handy back nine, just four over the card, allowed him to finish just a stroke behind Harry on net 71. CJ is hoping that the ProShop take pity on him and adjust the handicap on the card he submitted to them. In point of fact, they don’t have to, as the rules state that playing to a lower handicap, the score recorded stands, whereas playing to a higher handicap results in disqualification. The two stroke difference, that we kind-hearted types correct for rather than disqualify, means that he gets to fill third place with a net of 72 strokes.

Stan mostly had his driver working well today, and a few times expressed surprise that he managed to avoid some of his ‘usual’ travels to one side of the fairway or another. His shorter game did present a few moments during the round. A serious shank?, on the 8th, headed for the OOB fence at a fair rate of knots. Possibly, fortunately, it hit one of the fence posts absolutely dead centre and came straight back towards him for most of the distance. But, despite the short game glitches, a net score of 73 was enough to get fourth place, and the fourth Senior in a row. Could the oldies clean sweep the points? The answer to that question is no! Brendon put his drive on the first out onto the 10th, and managed to thread his way through the trees to leave the ball just through the green about pin high (from the normal approach). The putt never looked like missing, and the ‘birdie first’ omen was invoked. He managed to need a provisional to complete the third, and took a penalty on the sixth, which ended up leaving the front nine card looking a little sorry. The back nine was a little better, and he was able to scratch together a net score of 74 to take the final point on offer.

The ProPin today was set on the 4th, which, with the white set a fair way back, proved to be too much for the field, and there will be a Jackpot on offer next week (provided that we get enough players for a comp). The first BallPin was on the 12th, and Brendon had hopes of getting something more than a point for the day. However, Porks came along and went a bit better and added another ball to the long list that was owing to him from previous weeks. On the 18th, Brendon managed to make it onto the bottom deck, and, fairly reluctantly, measured the distance for the inside ProPin, which came out to something like 15.94m. Once again, he was foiled in his quest for loot when CJ got inside him, even if it was still some 12.5m from the hole. Needless to say, neither of these efforts resulted in a birdie, but we did manage to rack up a total of six for the day.

When Porks was asked about his game today, he indicated that he was suffering from a hangover. Not the alcoholic kind, but a hangover from his handicap busting performance last week. Bob had a couple of moments today. He managed to capsize his buggy, again, and bumped into others. While standing by the green on the 14th, he felt a bump on his leg, looked down, saw a ball and thought he had dropped his, so he picked it up. Only problem was, the ball was actually incoming from JQ. And, while on the subject of JQ, he might have made an error of club selection on the 18th and finished well short of the green, hard up against the base of a tree, which was a bit surprising given the slope of the ground in the vicinity. As an aside, for some time in the ‘clubhouse’, until the last group came in, and the mistake by CJ with card submission was detected, it looked as if a net score of 82 (multiple cards) could have scored a point. No names, no pack-drill.

A couple of birthdays didn’t get a mention last week. Michael actually had one last Saturday, and Adam celebrated one during the week. So, a little belatedly, the Birthday Birdie says, hope you had a good one, and many more of the same.

Results for Saturday, 05 Oct 2024
1st Harry Boughen (70) 2nd Craig Cameron (71) 3rd Chris Priems (72) 4th Stan Blackshaw (73) 5th Brendon Mitchell (74)

Seniors Results: 1st Harry Boughen (70) 2nd Craig Cameron (71) 3rd Chris Priems (72)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 4th Jackpot BallPin No 1 – 12th Ryan Porker BallPin No 2 – 18th Chris Priems