Maaaagnificent! As Rex Hunt used to scream as he commentated the footie way back when. The weather turned on a beauty, though it was a little on the fresh side at tee time. But, it soon warmed up, and, by the end of the round, a brisk northerly was in evidence, and the temperature had climbed into the dizzy heights of the twenties. This is known because JQ was asking if ‘the heat was getting hotter’ or was that just a symptom of getting older? Hot flushes anyone? To put him out of his misery, SOS fired up his trusty Apple watch to confirm that the temperature had indeed climbed to 21C. The course was fairly firm (including the teeing areas), and there was plenty of run to be had, provided that you stayed on the mowed areas. Not quite so much off the fairway, which made close in chips a tad more difficult to get just right. On the face of it, there appeared to be absolutely no reason why the fourteen members who turned out should not score well, and there was an expectation that sub-handicap results would be required to hoist the Medal.

As it turned out, there were no sub-handicap rounds to be seen. The best that we could manage were a couple of handicap-equalling rounds, with both Bob and Michael fronting the judges with net scores of sixty-eight. This meant that the judges had to go through the mental gymnastics required to carry out a count-back to determine just who would hoist the silver-ware. After checking the recording and the arithmetic to confirm the tie, the calculations for the net back nine result were done. Wouldn’t you know it, the scores were still tied on 32.5 apiece. The process then moved to the last six holes, with two thirds of half handicap being rather easier to work out for Michael’s case. A check and a recheck (and the computer eventually agreed), the medal was awarded to Bob with 20.66 to Michael’s 21.00.

CJ was pretty T’d off with his performance on the front nine, and his playing group had pretty much written him off as a chance. However, he stepped up to the 10th tee, and declared that he was going to par the back nine, and get back into the game. And, that is exactly what he did. Nary a birdie nor a bogie sullied the card as he came back with a vengeance to finish in second place with a net score of 70. Harry had a mixed day with his short game, and produced a number of Goldilocks chips and putts. Some too cold, some too hot, and some just right. This allowed him to put together a net 72, and left him with the thought that it could have been better. JQ had a run in with some trees on the left from the tee on the 2nd hole. He threaded one out down the fairway, and followed this up with a shot that finished on the green, but well past the hole. Unperturbed, he rattled it in with a ‘drainer’, for what, even he admitted, was an unlikely par, considering the starting position. He, too, managed a net 72 to share third place with Harry.

Dan has been racking up the kilometres with his trips back to Melbourne, which we like to imagine that he does just for the joy of playing with us. His game was not quite up to his recent form, but a pair of triples and a quadruple, made a pretty big difference to the bottom line. His net 74 was enough for fourth place. Prez should be nominated for an award at the presentations for Unobservant Member of the Year. Actually, maybe that should be the Decade, as Rob, only today, became aware of the column on the handicap sheet that shows the number of games that members have played with Club. In that case maybe the UMOY award should go to Targe, who just today noticed that the new Honour Boards had been installed in the hallway leading to the facilities. Anyway, Prez also finished net 74 to share fourth place. Despite SOS telling Brendon that his GA card should go to the back of the deck, somehow it got placed in the main part, so SOS didn’t actually score a point for fifth as announced. But, Brendon, who did actually finish with 75, held his place and filled fifth place on his ownsome.

The ProPin today was set for the 12th hole, but nobody was able to get close enough to put their name on the card, which means that there will be a jackpot to next week. There is not only a shortage of skills in the building industry. There is also one in the BallPin marker placement industry. The first BallPin was supposed to be on the 15th, but an unnamed President of the Club ‘forgot’ to put it out! So, we will call that one a Jackpot to next week as well. There have been some mysterious posts appearing around the course in recent times, and today it became obvious that they are supports for solar-powered cctv cameras. Intended to catch vandals was the logical conclusion. However, rumour has it that they are intended for catching cheats instead. Anyhow, Michael wanted to wait until the one at the 18th green is commissioned before he scores his hole-in-one so that it is recorded for posterity. So, today he left the ball 0.47m to the left of the hole to collect our ball, and, almost certainly, the ProShop ProPin.

Michael was resplendent in a ‘new’ pair of shorts after a shopping spree at the Salvos, in which he snapped up a bargain on a three for the price of two deal. SOS made a reverse Priems shot on the first when his drive found something pretty solid in the trees that sent it flying high into the air and hard left to finish on the edge of the 9th fairway. Prez was pretty chuffed when he chipped in for a birdie on the 9th. Brendon was off the green and asked Prez whether it was OK if he chipped in as well. Prez was in a magnanimous mood, and agreed that it would be OK. So, Brendon lined up and chipped in for birdie as well. Those two brought our tally of birdies to six for the day. Michael also contributed a couple to the birdie tally. The ‘gimme’ on the 18th pales in comparison to the outcome on the 10th. A stray drive into the trees ricocheted into a veritable graveyard of balls on the 13th fairway, and a lost ball was on the verge of being declared when, by Michael’s estimate, 2 minutes and 59 seconds had passed in the search, the ball was found close to the penalty area. Michael then smashed one over the trees and onto the 10th green, and sank the putt for the birdie.

Gordo had to finish the round using his trusty two iron as a putter after an equipment ‘failure’ on the 13th green. He reckons that he actually putted better afterwards, and swears that the impact with the ground was ‘relatively minor’. Examination of the failure by the resident metallurgist suggests that there actually were signs of a pre-existing start of fatigue failure that initiated the brittle failure that followed. Stan made a bit of a mess of his tee shot on the 2nd, and didn’t quite make it to the red markers. On the 6th, Targe flushed the bird-life on the pond beside the tee, not with his shot-gun, but with his ball, and also did not surpass the red markers. Faced with the prospect of two rounds of drinks, Targe and Stan negotiated a deal that the lower ranked player in the event would buy the drinks. Stan should have had no trouble paying with the fresh folding stuff in his wallet from selling a set of clubs to Harry’s tradie. It had been reported that Bob refused to give up on searching for his worn out old Pinnacle golf ball. As he was lining up to collect a new one for his win, JQ offered to do him a swap of three second hand for a new ProV1. No deal, said Bob. A couple of birthdays to be marked this week for Damo and Craig, but there are no reports of Priem’s style weekends away for either of them.

Results for Saturday, 02 Nov 2024
Winner Bob McDonald (68 c/b t6) 1st Michael Gourlay (68) 2nd Chris Priems (70) 3rd Harry Boughen (72) 3rd John Quinlan (72) 4th Dan Marie (74) 4th Robert Priems (74) 5th Brendon Mitchell (75)

Seniors Results: 1st Bob McDonald (68) 1st Michael Gourlay (68) 2nd Chris Priems (70) 3rd Harry Boughen (72)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 12th Jackpot BallPin No 1 – 15th Jackpot BallPin No 2 – 18th Michael Gourlay

Brendon was hoping to hit the headlines today and his drive on the first into Charlie’s bush was indeed the day’s big early news.

Blighty then went one better with a drive that dribbled off the first tee and didn’t even make it to Charlie’s bush.

We really should get a plaque for that bush.

Meanwhile, with third placed Blighty’s form not improving (-6 on the front 9 and -10 for the day) the big heavyweight title fight for the Fred Kitson very soon just had JQ and Craig in the ring punching and counter-punching.

Craig wiped the first even though he had a shot there, while JQ’s 5 for a half saw him extend his lead to 3.

But Old Reliable was soon back in town with a par for a plus on the 2nd, another on the 4th after a great tee shot there, two more on the 7th and 8th and he hit the turn at +3 for the day and +5 overall.

Meanwhile JQ had kept things steady and turned with +1 for the day to match Craig at +5 overall.

Game on!

Ali and Frazier had three big heavyweight fights back in the day, the Fight of the Century at Madison Square Garden in 1971 (Fraser in 15 rounds), Super Fight II in 1974 also at the Garden (which was a bit of a dud, Ali adopting controversial holding/clinching tactics and being lucky to be given the win on points) and 1975’s Thriller in Manilla which is remembered by many as one of the best and most brutal fights in boxing history.

Playing partners Blighty and Michael had the best seats in the house as Craig and JQ went at it over the back 9.

Ivanhoe’s Thriller in Manilla saw both Craig and CJ get themselves out of trouble to salvage great 5’s for half on 10, JQ sinking one of his new trademark 15 foot putts and Craig chipping sideways after being stymied by a tree.

Both parred 11, with Craig making a good up and down there. However with JQ sneaking a shot there off his 14 handicap (and Craig with no shot) it was advantage JQ by one.

The first crack in Craig’s armoury came on 12 when he missed a short par putt. JQ up by two.

Craig bounced back with two great shots into 13 to about 10 feet while JQ had been all over the shop out on the 10th fairway with his second and had left himself a 15 footer down the hill for a half. It was looking for all money like a two shot swing and back to all square but JQ nailed the putt! JQ one up.

Still all square after 14, both fighters hit the green on 15 but faced long putts, 40 feet or so. JQ’s magic putter won the battle there, putting to gimmie distance while Craig 3-putted. JQ by two.

Craig counterpunched again on 16 with two greats shots in there and slotting the 10 footer for birdie. It was a “double plus” that unfortunately for Craig only counted as one. JQ halved 16 and saw his lead back to one.

Off his 14 handicap JQ had a shot on 17 but Craig didn’t. Craig had another 10-15 footer for birdie and it just missed. JQ then had a rare putting blemish missing a short par putt but his 5 a half was enough to keep the lead by 1.

Before heading to the 18th, Michael gently enquired about the state of the contest. Having forgotten that JQ got a shot at 11, Michael had calculated them even, which is probably why he never got invited to score the Ali-Frazer fights.

JQ professed to not know the scores (bullshit thought Michael as they were marking each other’s cards) but Craig clarified that yes JQ was 1 up. With both having a shot on 18, it was a bit tense out there.

Both hit good shots into 18 but they pulled up a fraction short. If Craig could get up and down for par and JQ made a 4, it would be all tied up and a countback would be required (which Craig would have won by the way). If JQ stuffed up and made a 5, Craig would win outright.

But that all became academic when JQ, after hitting a dodgy chip to about 15 feet (his new pet distance with the putter) stepped up and knocked it straight in. Another 15 footer!

Craig, realising the fight was over, then carelessly 3-putted 18 to leave JQ the winner by 3. But that margin belies what a tough, close, high quality knock ’em down drag it out fight it was all day long.

JQ at +6 over the two weeks (+2 this week) and Craig at +3 overall (+1 this week) pummelled the rest of the field, with the best the rest could offer being Michael (-3 overall for 3rd), Steve G and Brendon -7 overall for joint 4th) and Gordo 5th with -8.

Note: when JQ and Craig next saddle up, JQ (14 into 10) will no longer have those cheeky strokes on 6, 9, 11, 17 that a good player like him shouldn’t need. Craig is back in single figures (10 to 9).

In other news of the day, the same driver of Brendon’s that crashed Charlie’s bush on the 1st drove it onto the green at 14, quite an effort considering the tee was about as far back as it can be there. Not to be outdone, SoS nearly drove the 16th green (only problem was the shot was from the 14th tee).

SoS did manage the win the money for a great shot to 1.91 metres on the 12th, while Adam hit it close on the 7th to win the ball there and Michael won the ball on 18.

When it comes to member temper tantrums, Harry can chuck one as good as most, especially when his putts keep rimming the hole. On 17, Harry had another one doing the rimming thing and Gordo was reported to be running for the hills fearing the blowing of the Harry volcano. Luckily the putt did a full 360 and dropped in. “Phew” said Gordo.

Earlier, Gordo had shocked his playing partners with a big long high drive on the 16th, a launching path much higher than his usual low worm burners.

Harry also hit a birdie on the 8th, but it was the feathered kind. Reports suggest no major injury to the bird.

It was great to see Raj come down for the BBQ. He is planning to be back in a fortnight or so and play in a cart for 4-6 weeks and then hopes to be back to normal and walking and playing in 2025.

As always, big thanks to the BBQ chefs and others who pitched in to help with organisation and clean-up. Our BBQ’s are one of the 10 “selling points” in our new club brochure designed to encourage new members to join us.

If you know anybody who might want to join us for the 2025 season and they need a bit of convincing, give them a copy of the brochure (copies available in the clubhouse).

Judging by today, JQ and Craig need some fresh competition.

Results for Saturday, 26 Oct 2024
1st John Quinlan (+4, + 2, + 6) 2nd Craig Cameron (+2, + 1, + 3) 3rd Michael Gourlay (-3, □, -3) 4th Steven Gervasoni (-6, -1, -7) 4th Brendon Mitchell (-5, -2, -7) 5th Gordon Hill (-5, -3, -8)

Seniors Results: 1st Craig Cameron (+2, +1, +3) 2nd Michael Gourlay (-3, □, -3) 3rd Steven Gervasoni (-6, -1, -7)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 12th Stephen O’Sullivan BallPin No 1 – 7th Adam King BallPin No 2 – 18th Michael Gourlay

Johnny Q was all smiles before tee-off for the first round of the 2024 Fred Kitson and even more so post-round.

After an amazing up and down par on the 18th from out near the 9th green, one of many brilliant up and downs during the round, JQ signed for +4 and established himself as the man to beat for one of the club’s most talked about trophies.

While JQ was doing the Pride of Jenni thing out front, Whitey was also looking on the Brightside after a round of +3 for second placing. However with Whitey a no show for Round 2, apparently something to do with a horse race, JQ was a bit disturbed to discover that the next in line, lurking quietly in the sunshine, is Craig at +2.

Apparently in JQ/Old Reliable head to heads over the years, JQ has on occasion come off second best to Craig, so the pressure will be on in the last group for Round 2.

Meanwhile a confident Blighty, after a square card, wasn’t shy in reminding that pair “don’t count me out” and given it is handicap conditions, not weight for age, with Blighty (22) Craig (10) and JQ (14) it will be a good contest down the straight between those three.

The best of the rest of the 14 man field was Porks mate Tim who had -2 off his handicap of 21. This was Tim’s first round after gaining his club handicap and like many a new member over the years (remember when Charles was winning everything) Tim looks very capable of murdering his handicap and having plenty of podium finishes in the near future. It’s not sure whether Tim and Porks (the week’s NAGA at -8) will be starters for Round 2.

The horses further back in the race did their best (worst) to be given the BBQ tongs, with Michael on -3 (highlighted by losses on the last 4 holes) and Brendon, Stan, Gordo and Harry on -5. Steve G is a further shot back at -6, with Dan proving that golf is indeed a funny game with a -7 after he scored the equivalent of +8 on the same handicap the week before.

CJ also managed -7 but perhaps his heart wasn’t in it because he knew he wasn’t going to be around for Round 2. He has a weekend away to celebrate his 60th birthday, enjoy and happy birthday Chris!

A bloke that Tim referred to as Ryan won the Propin on the 4th with a great shot in there, Whitey collected the ball on the 15th and Harry went close to breaking all records for length (11+ metres) for the nearest the pin on 18.

With CJ and Dan non-starters for Round 2 and Porks also contemplating doing a runner to avoid BBQ duties, thankfully there is rumoured to be an influx of BBQ experts turning up for Round 2, including Prez Priems, SoS, Adam and Matty. Also attending the BBQ will be special guest Raj who is on the mend from his broken ankle and looking to get back to playing again before Christmas.

During the week Harry suggested we get in the mode to celebrate “double centuries” this week.

What he was referring to was that Adam will be playing his 100th game with the club this week and SoS his 700th. You can find the game count, with those two highlighted in yellow, in the Handicap Sheet under “Competitions” on the club website.

CJ leads that race with 1,121. Others of note between CJ and SoS are Bobby (952) Targe (917) and Gordo (881). Peps (690) will be next to hit 700 and Harry (582) will hit 600 in 2025 while Brendon (488) is heading to 500.

Results for Saturday, 19 Oct 2024
Leaderboard Round 1: 1st John Quinlan (+4) 2nd Rodney White (+3) 3rd Craig Cameron (+2) 4th Andrew Blight (□) 5th Tim Mathers (-2)

Seniors Leaderboard: 1st Rodney White (+3) 2nd Craig Cameron (+2) 3rd Andrew Blight (□)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 4th Ryan Porker BallPin No 1 – 15th Rodney White BallPin No 2 – 18th Harry Boughen

It was quaddies rather than trifectas on the agenda on the first day at Cobram-Barooga for the big 2024 Mustard Jacket weekend.

With Peps and his mate Paddy on the job, they landed 2 quaddies (Melbourne and Sydney).

Off the back of this success, most of the boys headed to Saturday night dinner in good spirits, even though the quality of golf on the West Course earlier in the day hadn’t been all that brilliant.

Word filtered through from Ivanhoe that Dan had played a blinder (44 points to win the inside comp) which was 10 better than the day one leader (Jake Priems with 34) in the Mustard Jacket contest.

Hot on Jake’s heels was CJ and Zimmer with 32, Steff and Dale with 30 and Geoff and dark horse Paddy on 29.

Defending champion Brent was on 28 and still in touch, joined on that score by his roommates Chris James and Michael.

Of the rest, Gordo’s 18 points was a standout and earned him the honour of donning the new Mustard NAGA guernsey to wear in the first group out on Sunday morning.

However there was plenty of company in the contest for the overall NAGA with Steve G and Prez Priems on 19, Craig on 20, Matty and Josh on 21 and Kenny and Brendon on 22.

Sos and Peps were officially midfield with 24.

As Day 2 unfolded on the “Old Course” a few of the backmarkers were showing some good form with Matty 35 and Craig 34 racing past a few of the more tired horses ahead of them.

But they were too far back to trouble the leaders. Steff was striking the ball beautifully but his putting was letting him down (including twice having eagle putts and three putting for pars).

Soon it was clear it was a three horse race, with Jake, Zimmer and CJ well in front.

By the time they got to the 17th tee, Jake had a 5 shot lead over CJ and it was all over.

Despite only scoring one point in the closing two holes, Jake won by two shots, with a second day 34 for 68, with CJ in second place on 66 after adding 34 to his first round 32. Zimmer on 65 (32, 33) was hot on his heels in third place with Paddy fourth on 59 (29, 30) and Steff fifth on 57 (30, 27).

After taking a while to get a few boys back from the bar and/or cafe and herd everybody around the table and keep them there, Matty announced the winners of all the ancillary prizes (4 x nearest the pins each day) the calcutta for winner and NAGA, and of course the NAGA itself. Gordo was very pleased to pass on the mustard NAGA guernsey to Rob for him to wear on Day 1 next year.

SoS was also given a trophy but I wasn’t entirely sure what for. I think it was meant to be for worst shot of the weekend, which really should have gone to Josh, who manged to hit a hybrid into the ground that popped straight up in the air and then spun backwards on landing and finished behind him.

SoS did hit the shot of the day on Day 2. On the long par 3 third, over the bunker to a clear nearest the pin winner there. Indeed SoS’s front 9 on Day 2 of 18 points was probably the best 9 holes played all weekend, so maybe that’s why he won the trophy.

Finally, with all the other presentations out of the way, last year’s winner Brent put the famous Mustard Jacket on Jake.

While he declined the invitation to make a long victory speech, he gets to wear the Mustard Jacket in the pool room (and bragging rights over CJ) until this time next year when he will start as the man to beat for the jacket in 2025.

CJ will be back again to have another crack and see if he can add to the one time he has won the jacket previously.

Harry’s website doesn’t seem to have a list of Mustard Jacket winners, but rumour is CJ’s win was many moons ago. Stand by for an update after the winner’s names sewn into the jacket are inspected.

Matty has committed to organising again next year and is suggesting there will be a switch to Rich River. I wonder who won the jacket last time it was played at Rich River?

To recap the placings:

Winner – Jake Priems 68 (34, 34)

Runner Up – Chris Priems 66 (32, 34)

NAGA – Rob Priems 36 (19, 17)

Hence the special Priems Trifecta, 1st, 2nd and NAGA.

Third – Zimmer (sorry I don’t know his actual name) 65 (32, 33)

Fourth – the legendary Quaddy Paddy 59 (29, 30). The data suggests Peps might be a better punter with Paddy on board?

Fifth – Steff 57 (30, 27)

Then came:

56 – Matty (21, 35) Chris James (28, 28) Michael (28, 28)

54 – Craig (20, 34)

53 – SoS (24, 29) Brent (28, 25)

52 – Peps (24, 28)

51 – Brendon (22, 29) Geoff (29, 22) and Dale (30, 21)

49 – Steve G (19, 30)

46 – Josh (21, 25)

43 – Gordo (18, 25)

42 – Kenny (22, 20)

36 – Rob (19, 17)

For those of you interested in Club Championship points (really only Michael at this stage as everybody else has lost interest) three of the first five placings in the Mustard Jacket contest (Jake, Zimmer, Paddy) are not official club members, so with points being allocated to club members only, this bumped CJ to first for the points (and the winner’s handicap penalty), Steff to second, Michael and Matty to third, Craig to fourth and Brent and a very gallant SoS collecting a point for fifth.

Meanwhile back at Ivanhoe, there were no points on offer because only four booked and only three turned up, Dan, Harry and Stan. Harry’s report includes that “we could have played in the dark because Dan absolutely shot the lights out.”

Ivanhoe: Just the three of us…..

It was a beautiful day out on the green sward that is Ivanhoe Golf Course. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and the whole world was happy, even if most had decamped to other pastures further north. Unfortunately, only three members could make it to the tees. Targe had some sort of a ‘mechanical’ and his trusty chariot could not make it this far. Either that, or he seriously slept in. Undaunted, Dan, Stan, and Harry played a social round, while endeavouring to score well enough to feature in the results of the ProShop competition. The greenkeepers had done the course proud, with the greens cleaned and nicely manicured for the occasion. The pin placements were mostly giving plenty of green to play with, but a bit of fuzziness in the second cut could easily result in that green needing to be putted across.

As it turned out, we could have finished up playing in the dark, because Dan absolutely ‘shot the lights out’. He started out steadily enough, but then he lit the fuse, and managed to put together five (or was it six) pars in a row to finish the front nine in just one stroke over par, and with 26 points in the results column. The scoring feast was even being broadcast live in England, where Charlie was hanging on every message. The frenetic pace slowed just a little on the back, but he still managed another eighteen points to finish with forty-four of the best. It just so happened that his Club and daily handicap were the same, so he won the ProShop comp, and must have broken the heart of the second place-getter who came home with 43 points. Without a formal comp, the Club handicap did not take the beating that the GA did.

As for Harry and Stan, let’s just say that some things were not kind to their results. Stan suffered from a case of what (for a rightie) would be classified as the ‘shanks’. As a leftie, maybe an over-closed club-face. Still, he did make a bit of a comeback on the second nine, but still fell well short of Dan’s dizzy heights. His last tee shot of the day finished just 2.76m from the pin, which was more than good enough to win the inside ProPin. It was proposed that there should be a nearest-the-pin (anywhere) on the 12th for a couple of dollars each. Stan must have been short of change, because he ‘decided’ that it should be for a cup of coffee. Harry was jubilant when his tee shot headed straight for the pin, and looked to be a hot contender, particularly when Dan and Stan pulled up short. Unfortunately, the ball had run further than anticipated, and Dan was closer, even though he was not on the green. Harry rued not having specified that it had to be on the green! And Stan bought coffee for everyone. Other than that, Harry didn’t mind the number of three putts that he took. What really upset him was the number of short second ones that he missed.

Results for Saturday, 12 Oct 2024
Ivanhoe: No Competition

Challenge: 1st Chris Priems (32, 34, 66) 2nd Stefan Belevski (30, 27, 57) 3rd Michael Gourlay (28, 28, 56) 3rd Matt Hunt (21, 35, 56) 4th Craig Cameron (20, 34, 54) 5th Brent Rowley (28, 25, 53) 5th Stephen O’Sullivan (24, 29, 53)

Seniors Results:
Ivanhoe : No Competition
Challenge: 1st Chris Priems (32, 34, 66) 2nd Matt Hunt (21, 35, 56) 2nd Michael Gourlay (28, 28, 56) 3rd Craig Cameron (20, 34, 54)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – – No Competition BallPin No 1 – – No Competition BallPin No 2 – – No Competition