Yearly Archives: 2017

It was Melbourne’s ‘unofficial’ long weekend.  There were a few dark looking clouds around.  And the dark clouds did rain on the parade for a while but never seriously enough to affect play.  It was a bit on the chilly side and there was a bit of a breeze helping to up the wind chill factor but no real need to skull them along the ground to keep them out of the wind.  And there were parties.  The Priems family celebrated long and hard last weekend and as Chrispy edges ever closer to his coveted membership of the Seniors ranks, his powers of recovery seem to be declining.  Or is he partying harder?  Michael was also suffering the effects of the night before.  Damo didn’t show, so he obviously wanted to work on his birthday hangover by himself.  Whatever the reasons, there were only 15 members turned up for the penultimate monthly medal of this year’s competition and hopes were high as a result.  Noodles’ main wish was that Harry would come in last, or at least below him and out of the points.  Trev’s hip gave out on the 9th and he had to withdraw.  Let’s hope it isn’t too serious and we see Trev back on the tee soon.

Well, if you didn’t have a hangover when you arrived at the course today you could be forgiven for thinking you were suffering DTs when you beheld the sight of Chrispy, resplendent in his John Daly pants.  People were reaching for their sun-glasses and SOS asked later whether he had really bought them.  Seems they were a family gift for his birthday and even Chrispy had a hard time adjusting when he looked down to putt.  His putting doesn’t seem to have been affected too badly, though he did manage to shank his irons about five or six times.  Despite all that, he managed to get around in 79 strokes for a net score of 67.  He wasn’t alone though as he played alongside Brent who wasn’t distracted by Chrispy FlashPants and he also carded 79 strokes and, with the same handicap as Chris, tied the score at 67.  So, the medal was decided by a count-back and Chrispy took the day with his 36 (nett 30) on the back, beating out Brent’s 38 (nett 32).  Welcome to the Priems family, Brent.  You’ll probably never hear the end of it.

Gordon wasn’t suffering from a hangover, that he was owning up to anyway.  But on the second, he confidently strode up to a ball and declared, this is my Srixon with red lines on it and proceeded to whack it further down the fairway.  As it turned out, Keith was also playing with a Srixon with red text and arrow printed on the ball and Gordon was dismayed to find out that he had struck the wrong ball.  Penalties ensued.  This left him with a card , net 70.  Except for three putts on what should have been a one putt green, the overall result could have been different entirely.  Gordon took some consolation in the fact that he got top points in the Seniors.  The Beast is one for looking for omens and alignments in the stars and he was looking for some sort of synchronicity between events when he walked up to a ball on the 11th (second hole on the back nine) and hit a ball (Srixon), partly obscured by a leaf, only to find that his (Srixon) actually lay half a metre or so away.  How spooky is that, Bill asked.  Not nearly as spooky as Halloween according to some reports.

Keith came out of his little hidey-hole today and, although he had his moments, he steered clear of the ibises (actually there weren’t any on the course) and put together a card reading 94 net 71.  Dale’s most exciting part of the game was marking Brent’s card and he too put in a very steady 93 net 71 to share the third place on the podium.  Bob, on the other hand had a s**t of a day (his words, not mine) but despite that he managed to get a net 72 and fill 4th place.  Bob obviously has very high standards.  He reckons he went close to getting a hole-in-one today but missed by trying too hard on the ‘misplaced’ ProPin hole, 15th.  the ball hit the pin and finished some 20m from the hole and off the green.

There were three players came in to fill 5th place with net 73.  Harry, who couldn’t hit the centre of the hole to save himself.  Noodles who was heard to be expressing his displeasure but didn’t abuse any personal equipment.  And Craig who just plugged away and didn’t say anything of note.

Chrispy did the tee marshall’s job and tried to blame Noodles for the fact that he set the 12th as the BallPin and the 15th as the mobile ProPin.  The nearest the Pin results are printed on the Handicap Sheet Chris!  So, when Gordon put his ball onto the 12th and survived a measure-off against DennisT he was a bit disappointed to find that it was just for the Ball.  However, when it came to the 18th, he was more than happy to put his name on the card when the ball finished 4.07m out from the pin.  This was also enough to get his name on the inside card as well.  The outcome of that event remains to be seen.

Blame it on the hangover but Michael had a triple bogie on the 13th which is a bit atypical for a man with a 2 handicap.  Not surprising, perhaps, that there was an angry person wanting to belt the daylights out of the ball on the 14th.  Well, the ball got right back at Michael and refused to progress beyond the Red markers.  It obviously calmed down by the 15th and very conveniently flew to 2.82m from the pin, whereupon Michael left his IOU for the draughtie as he needed to dash off on some errand or other (or to buy some Panadol).  No one of the Nearest the Pin winners were able to convert their good fortune into birdies and we only managed to score five for the day.  Pretty slim pickings.

The Birthday Birdie is busy this week.  Damo had his today and Mal and CraigC have theirs during the week.  Think of as one step closer to playing your age.  But have a great day and try to avoid hang-overs.

It’s getting very close to the end of the competition year and those members who have perpetual trophies should bring them back as soon as possible so the Gordon can get the plaques up to date for the presentations at the Christmas break-up.  Also, if everybody can let him know if you are planning to attend so that he can get the catering correct.  We’d hate anybody to miss out but even more importantly, we’d hate to pay for more than we need.

Also, can everybody get to and pay their subscriptions for next year ($30 for Club and $90 for GolfLink).  Bank transfer is preferred.  If you are planning not to re-join or to change your GolfLink status please let Harry know as soon as possible so that our records can be updated so that we do not incur unrecoverable expenses.

Gordon will be circulating everybody again but, if possible we would like people to reserve a place at the Annual Challenge by paying a deposit of $50 per adult person attending.  Even if you are not sure, a pre-emptive payment will help the Club to meet the Rich River deposit requirements later this month and if your circumstances change, the deposits will be refundable.

Results for Saturday, 04 November 2017
1st Chris Priems(67) MM (c/b) 1st Brent Rowley(67) 2nd Gordon Hill(70) 3rd Keith Delzoppo(71) 3rd Dale Webb(71) 4th Bob McDonald(72) 5th Harry Boughen(73) 5th Stephen Butterfield(73) 5th Craig Cameron(73)

Seniors Results: 1st Gordon Hill (70) 2nd Keith Delzoppo (71) 3rd Bob McDonald (72)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin No 1 15th Michael Gourlay ProPin No 2 18th Gordon Hill BallPin 12th Gordon Hill

Smiling faces were pretty thin on the ground this morning.  There was apparently some sort of family function on today that kept about 75% on the members away from the important business of playing golf.  But, there were enough smiling faces around for there to be a ‘proper’ competition and nine members set out buoyed by the thought that there could be points to be had.  Harry turned up, doubtful that he might play due to some eye irritation.  But, after a cup of coffee and hearing that Noodles was going to turn up, there was something of a recovery and Harry was in the field.  Noodles went close to getting ducked today.  No, he wasn’t playing cricket and it isn’t mis-spelled.  As he walked towards his ball on the 11th he went close to a pair of ducks and their brood of eight and after a certain amount of hackle raising and hissing (by the duck), it decided to attack and Noodles had to run for cover.  So, you could say we had a serving of duck with noodles or Number 69 on the menu.!

There was very little ducking and weaving for Stefan today as he regularly peppered the greens from the tee.  On the green at the 11th. just short at the 13th, pin high on the 14th – the points just kept adding up.  Four points for his birdie on the 13th was just one of three featheries that he scored and there were only six in total for the day but with the small field that is perhaps not unexpected.  When interviewed after the round, Stef expressed the view that it was a ‘pretty crap’ round but perhaps his opinion as a little bit coloured by having taken three putts on two of the last three holes.  Forty points is still a pretty flash score and the handicapper was fairly salivating at the prospect of wielding his little axe.

Next behind Stef with 35 points was Joe who started off like a house on fire to put together 20 points by the turn.  A couple of non-scoring holes on the back nine limited Joe to 15 points but at least it left his handicap safe for another day.  Now, Joe has been out getting in some practice during the week and he uses this opportunity to fulfill some of his child caring duties and he is quite convinced that the young fellow is already taking an interest in the game – when he isn’t thinking of eating that is.

Porks revealed that he is really a right hander but that he plays left-handed because his father did.  This prompted Noodles to challenge him to a driving competition using each others club.  It was probably a draw as Noodles put his well and truly out of bounds while Ryan went close to qualifying for a draughtie with his.  Despite the shenanigans, Ryan was able to keep it together enough for his quite good front nine to carry him to a total of 32 points and a share of third place.  The Beast played a couple of steady halves but he was driving pretty well and he was able to drive the 11th and make the birdie and so was able to share the spoils on offer.

Harry had his moment s and managed to leave q few out there due to some less than stellar chipping and putting.  However, the highlight would have to have been the putt from the very back of the green on the 4th to sink it in the hole a bit over a metre from the front of the green for a birdie and an Eclectic point.  Brendon was pursuing everybody to find out how they were running and was calculating his chances of featuring for a point in the Championship.  In other circumstances, he probably would have cried shame for accepting points for 28 points but, today, he made an exception and gratefully, if not gracefully, accepted the last place point.  Six point-getters out of a field of nine – no names, no pack-drill – for those that missed out.

The Nearest the Pin competitions almost didn’t happen today.  The acting tee-marshal nominated the holes but did not get the markers from the front desk.  The leading group were detailed to pick them up after the 9th and, fortunately, they were reminded by the following group before they headed off down the fairway and Allan tootled back to the office on his trusty scooter to collect them.  The first ProPin was on the 12th and a couple of people got onto the green but none close enough to lay claim to the money and so there will be a Jackpot to next week.  Now, you would reckon that everybody should know that there is no distance requirement on the BallPin which was located on the 15th.  Stef claims that  he was confused by the several old claim slips in the box and that he thought that he had to be within distance.  The Beast also is reported to have hit the green but he had departed early and so fisticuffs were avoided when the ball was awarded to Stef.  The second ProPin on the 18 also went begging after six out of six in the last group missed the green and Joe’s shot from the front group was outside the distance limit.  A bit of an incentive to come along next week to pick up a few dollars.

Brendon was noted playing with a very fetching pink ball today.  Another player on the course had found one somewhere and very kindly offered it as a token of esteem (or something).  Anybody would have thought that Noodles was playing Bridge today and that Clubs were trumps.  It wasn’t playing cards that he was throwing around though.  Allan owned up to scoring a draughtie today on the 15th and not only did the ball not get to the red tee markers, it didn’t even get to the end of the top teeing area as it dribbled down the side to finish near to the 14th green.

SOS wasn’t able to play today as he was feeling a bit sore and sorry for himself after falling off a scooter and breaking a couple of ribs.  No laughing matter and SOS reckons he couldn’t laugh even if he wanted to.  Have a speedy recovery, SOS and we look forward to seeing you back on the tee before Christmas.  And, in a message to all members SOS says please pay your Club ($30) and GolfLink ($90) subs as soon as possible by direct deposit into the Club Account (details on the web-site if you don’t already have them).

In a similar vein, Gordon has to get deposits ($50 per person attending) in for the Annual Challenge at Rich River next October as a deposit has to be paid to Rich River shortly and we need to get the funds in.  These payments are also preferred to be by deposit into the bank account.  Changes of mind to non-attendance will be possible so it is best to get in and reserve a place rather than run the risk of missing out by leaving it too late.

Results for Saturday, 28 October 2017
1st Stefan Belevski(40) 2nd Joe Wagenecht(35) 3rd Bill Eastoe(32) 3rd Ryan Porker(32) 4th Harry Boughen(31) 5th Brendon Mitchell(28)

Seniors Results: 1st Bill Eastoe (32) 2nd Harry Boughen (31) 3rd Allan Davies (25)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin No 1 12th Jackpot ProPin No 2 18th Jackpot BallPin 15th Stefan Belevski

It was a bit dark and gloomy out and about today as the clouds loured and, a couple of times they almost gave out with one of the promised showers of rain.  Fortunately, the drops were very small and the precipitation did not last for long.  The south-westerly kept the temperature down, barely above shivering level but it was not strong enough to be much of a help, or a hindrance, to the playing of the game.  Twenty people ventured out onto the course with the drop-out members being replaced by drop-in members and Brendon’s dad was replaced by JohnQ’s workmate, Pete, who travelled all the way from London to join us for the day (or maybe not).  Pete was so impressed by Pepsi that he reckons he wants to join the Club.  Not so much for how Pepsi played but for what he was able to say.

Rumours abounded out on the course about how well people were, or were not, going but, as it turned out, all of the action was taking place at the head of the leader board in the final group.  Harry and Craig started the day with a one shot lead on MattN who was only a single point in front of Ed.  The fortunes fluctuated a bit on the front nine and at the turn, Harry and Matt were square for the day while Craig had dropped a stroke to be even with Matt behind Harry.  Ed had the worst of it and turned at -3 for the day and needing a bit of an effort to stay in contention.  Harry dropped a point at the 10th and there was a three way contest in the offing.  That is until Harry and Matt strung together three plusses apiece and pretty much left Craig gasping in their dust.  Harry managed to extend his plus run to five on the trot and it looked as if he might have the jump.  But, Matt got his mojo back and started another run of plus while Harry struck a bit of a rough patch on the last three holes.  Whilst it would have been possible for a tied score after the 18th, Matt would have won the count-back and, in the event, he snatched the victory with +6 on the back nine and for the day giving a grand total for the event of +8.

In his acceptance speech at the presentation, Matt said how pleased he was to have found the Club and how much he enjoyed playing with us.  He also thanked Harry for pushing him so much as he might not have scored so well otherwise.  Fred would probably be well pleased to see his trophy so keenly contested in a Par Competition.  There are rumours about that next year’s Fred Kitson Trophy will be a coffee table or that the Huon pine might have been sold off to the highest bidder.  Keep your eye out for ads in the Cape York News.

Harry did say that he was going to keep coming second to protect his handicap in his effort to catch Michael in the Championship.  Unfortunately, the maths now requires some wins as well and even this effort has been a bit expensive in the handicap department.  Bob, Chrispy and the other Matt put in a very good effort and picked up some points for their third placing.  Chrispy had to dash off to some family function or another.  It wasn’t his birthday although the Birthday Birdie does have a whisper that Chris has something to celebrate later in the week.  One step closer to the Seniors, hey Chris!

Craig was able to brush off the dust and finished with -1 overall to score a place in 4th spot.  He was joined there by Porks who fared a bit better this week than he did last.  Noodles was pretty pleased to finish in the points with his -3 result for the event.  Particularly as he finished with only 7 clubs in his bag after his favourite 3 iron went to God after a run in with the ground on the 6th hole.  Brendon managed much better today without his father to compete with and, with Pepsi, rounded out the point scorers.

Now, if you thought DennisW did it tough putting in the card he did last week when he knew he wasn’t playing this week and that Matt’s +6 today was a pretty impressive score, spare a thought for Brent, who didn’t play last week and fairly took the course apart today to post the best score of the day with a +8.  At least he got a ball in the daily ball-run.

It is possible that there was more anticipation about the Club today over what would happen in the Nearest the Pin competitions.  The least excitement was probably associated with the BallPin which was, once again, on the 4th.  Although Harry did have a good go at his, so-called, favourite hole, it was Pepsi who was able to put it close enough to hold out all contenders and collect the little white pill.  The ProPin on the 12th was a Jackpot from last week and there were a number of nice tries but nobody was able to get inside Gordon who was in the Chef’s Brigade and put his  to 3.53m from the hole.  When passed on the course, Gordo seemed a little grumpy so this could very well have been a highlight.  But, all eyes were on the big prize on the 18th and the pin was on the lower deck so hopes were high with negotiations about sharing dividends being carried out at fever pitch.  Most groups just said ‘Just do it’.  In one group, however, a certain Kiwi held out and decided that he was going to go it alone.  Brendon’s tee shot looked good.  Jason’s tee shot looked good (though Brendon did suggest that it got a good bounce).  When the tape measure came out, Jason’s ball was at 2.75m, Brendon’s was at 2.85m.  Three happy Aussies, one sad Kiwi.

Harry’s drive on the 7th took one bounce and hit the top of the flagstick and stopped about 3m from the hole instead of, possibly, in the dam behind the green.  The putt finished about 5mm outside the hole and so there was not a contribution to the total of twenty birdies from that piece of luck (or was it skill?).  This is one of our better strike rates for a while but whether it says something about the standard of the golf or the standard of the course could easily be debated.  One other thing of note on the birdie front was the fact that an entire group of four players scored birdies on the 15th.  Well done Brent, Jason, Rob and Brendon.  The Eagles Nest is starting to show signs of overflowing but there were a couple of near things today with Rob and Porks leaving chips just short of the elusive two under.

Rob didn’t have it all his own way though as he managed to score the dreaded draughtie on the 4th and the ball was quite a way short of the red markers.  Bob’s wife gave him a present recently and he wondered why she would have been giving him a box of golf balls (he already has a 200l drum full).  It turns out they were made of chocolate and probably wouldn’t have taken the spin that Bob is used to playing for.  Though they might not have been any worse than his drive from the 1st.  Speaking of drives, Ed opted to go for the green on the 17th so he teed the ball well up and took out his driver and fairly laid into it.  It wasn’t the location of the ball that was of interest, It was the position of the tee.  It popped up and landed on Ed’s shoulder, and stayed there.  Ed reached across and retrieved it as if nothing was unusual about that.

Results for Saturday, 21 October 2017

1st Matt Nicholls(+2, +6, +8) 2nd Harry Boughen(+3, +2, +5) 3rd Matt Hunt(+1, +1, +2) 3rd Bob McDonald(-1, +3, +2) 3rd Chris Priems(-1, +3, +2) 4th Craig Cameron(+3, -2, +1) 4th Ryan Porker(-1, +2, +1) 5th Stephen Butterfield(-2, -1, -3) 5th Brendon Mitchell(-3, □, -3) 5th Andrew Petricola(-2, -1, -3)

Seniors Results: 1st Harry Boughen {+2,+3,+5)2nd Bob McDonald (+3,-1,+2) 3rd Craig Cameron (-2,+3,+1)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin No 1 12th Gordon Hill ProPin No 2 18th Jason Hopkins BallPin 4th Andrew Petricola

Gordon confidently filled his umbrella holder with pencils, cigar tubes and other assorted paraphernalia with the quiet confidence of somebody who knew it wasn’t going to rain, despite the rather heavy looking clouds that were hanging around.  As it turned out, his confidence was well founded as the cloud eventually moved on and out came the sun to warm the cockles of your heart.  After the round Pepsi was lolling back in his chair soaking it all up and declaring “How good is this?”  So good that twenty one players (including one guest) did their best to tame the wildness that is Ivanhoe Public Golf Course.  Some were more successful than others on the course taming front leaving some with the prospect of showing their prowess at the bar-be-que table or needing to post a phenomenal turn-around to have a chance for a podium position.  In golf, as in life, anything is possible, however unlikely.

There was one man who reveled in the conditions that were presented today and so, you might well ask, why is there a picture with two smiling faces in the post.  Well, first, DennisW has to head off to the US of A to meet a family that will soon be linked to his through a nuptial event and he won’t be available to play next week.  So, despite the possibility that +5 could be sufficient to win the event at the end of the day, Dennis will just have to grin and bear it and take a cut to his handicap as well.  It’s tough but those are the rules.  And second, Dennis had nicked off before a picture could be taken.  Yes, there are pics in the archive but it was too good an opportunity to pass up.

So, as a result of all that, the competition leaders for next week will be Harry and CraigC who played together but did not mark each other’s card so there was no chance of collusion.  Harry was so enthusiastic that he stepped up onto the 3rd tee confident that the group in front was out of his range.  As his ball headed down the right side of the fairway, who should step out of the bushes?  None other than Ed, who made it known that he was not happy.  Craig just plugged away quietly and went close to being the man of the moment for his group.  With a big Jackpot riding on the 18th, the group agreed that the proceeds would be split in the event of a win.  Craig responded by putting his on the green.  Despite measuring from the hole to the ball and the ball to the hole, the measurement came up the same, 5.05m.  Damn!  So, a super-duper Jackpot next week on the 18th that some people reckon they would rather win than the trophy and the points.  Sorry Fred, if you are watching.

MattN seems to be getting his game settled down after a bit of a rough start after joining us and he has been featuring in the finish on a regular basis of late.  His +2 will see him well placed to make a lunge and capture a fine piece for the fire-place (on the mantel, that is).  And only needing a little more of a lunge on +1 we have another Matt of the H variety and Big Man Ed who once again made his presence heard around the course (not including abusing Harry).

Those in fifth place have just a little bit more work to do with their cards of -1 but, in Par, a four point turn around is not impossible and so they cannot be counted out of the calculations.  This group includes Trevor, Bob, Ryan and Chrispy.  Now, it seems that Chrispy’s effort was one of dogged determination as the putts refused to fall for him and while Chris is known for being able to give a bit of lip, having the ball lip the cup again and again started to get to him.  When the group got to the 18th tee, Chris had more birdies on his card that he had pars.  He evened up the tally with a par on the 18th.  But, in his way, Chris did contribute to the total of 14 birdies that we managed to gather together.  Possibly a bit on the light side given the good conditions.  And, a few people need to get a few more strategic ones in if they want to dislodge Blighty from the top of the Eclectic table.

The Nearest the Pin competition is getting very interesting.  The BallPin was on the 4th and there is a pernicious rumour about that this is Harry’s favourite.  That is not strictly true but he was able to put his ball to pin high and a couple of metres away to take out the ball.  What would have been the favourite hole today was the 12th, which was the location for the mobile ProPin, but unfortunately his shot was 5.5m away.  But, nobody else was able to worry it and so there will be a Jackpot to next week.  The first sighting of the pin placement on the 18th, on the top deck close to the change in level elicited the comment that it would be tough again today.  Even though the pin was re-positioned onto the lower deck (note MIchael) the result was as reported earlier.

Bob is a hard man to please and a number of times during the round he was upset when the ball didn’t finish where he wanted it to.  Does it ever?  Trevor was heard to ask, “Why do I keep doing that?”  The simple answer, Trev, is just stop doing whatever you are doing.  Brendon’s Dad was here again and played a score exactly the same as he did last week so he is nothing, if not consistent.  He is heading back across the Ditch with a driver that used to belong to Brendon.  He hit it so well today that Brendon is thinking of charging him for it.  Always in for a quid is Brendon.

Gordon had a hard time of it today as his short game in particular abandoned him.  At one stage he was considering reverting to his Jack Newton persona and playing one handed.  At one stage he could have been accused of making a club perform aerial gymnastics, though, to be fair, he was returning it to the vicinity of his bag and buggy.  It is not clear in which direction Noodles chose to launch one of his clubs.  Now, we know that some members are a little more vertically challenged than others.  So, was it or was it not surprising for Ed to ask whether Targe had turned up late when he spotted SOS from a distance on the course.  And, getting back to Gordon, he was fishing through the pockets of his Club vest when he pulled out a handful of money.  It seems it was the Club funds from a couple of weeks back that he thought he had lost somewhere and had to make up out of his own kick.  Always pays to check every possibility.

There was a Committee meeting today.  A few points of interest as it relates to the Calendar for next year.  The Annual Challenge will be at Rich River on the first weekend in October.  This will push the Monthly Medal and Fred Kitson back by a week.  In each month in which there are two Par Club Events, the second will be a GrandPar Competition in which you can score multiple positive scores.  For example, if you birdie a hole with a stroke, you score two points etc.  Not much different to normal Par, but people will feel better about it.  The downside is that the bonus points will count towards handicapping.

It was also decided that the Club Membership fee would be increased to $30 per year.  The Committee realises that this is a substantial jump but it is many years since the last increase.  The fee for GolfLink membership will remain the same at $90.  The Committee also asks that members pay their subscription at their earliest opportunity by making a bank transfer to the Club Account attaching your name to the transaction.  If any current member reading this is planning to discontinue their membership/GL membership, can they please advise, preferably in writing (email) so that we can get our registers in order before the deadline to avoid un-recoverable charges.

Results for Saturday, 14 October 2017
Leaderboard Round 1 1st Dennis Ward(+5) 2nd Harry Boughen(+3) 2nd Craig Cameron(+3) 3rd Matt Nicholls(+2) 4th Matt Hunt(+1) 4th Ed Kloprogge(+1) 5th Trevor Jackson(-1) 5th Bob McDonald(-1) 5th Ryan Porker(-1) 5th Chris Priems(-1)

Seniors Leaderboard: 1st Dennis Ward (+5) 2nd Craig Cameron (+3) 2nd Harry Boughen (+3) 3rd Ed Kloprogge (+1)

Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin No 1 12th Jackpot ProPin No 2 18th Jackpot BallPin 4th Harry Boughen