What a lovely day for golf. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and the whole world was happy. Except, maybe, for Joe, who was just one of the seventeen members who stepped up to the white markers (mostly) for the February Monthly Medal. The cause of Joe’s consternation had Ben rolling in the aisles as he recounted the tale again and again as each group fronted up to the tables after the round. It seems that Joe had played his third shot onto the 13th green about a metre from the hole, and Joe was as pleased as Punch with his effort. A flock of cockatoos had been making a good job of tearing up the green, and one of them decided that he liked the look of Joe’s ball and flew off with it. Joe placed another ball on the spot and then set off in pursuit of the felonious bird. There were suggestions that Joe would have to play the ball ‘as it lies’ even if it was still in the bird’s beak. No sooner had Joe turned his back than another bird purloined his replacement ball. As he eye-balled the wayward cocky, it could almost be imagined that it was laughing at him as it perched and shrieked, ball still firmly held in its beak. To add insult to injury, Joe missed the putt (when he eventually got around to it), and the blame was firmly placed on the head of the cockatoo(s). In the same pantomime, Targe’s ball went missing, and it had to be assumed that it too had appealed to one of the hungry, but not too discerning, birds.
New Brent(L) had one of those days. He was absolutely creaming his tee shots. On the 5th, he went close to driving the green. When the occasional one went astray, such as on the 11th, when he finished out in the middle of the 6th, Rob said, not to worry, over the trees onto the green and putt. Wouldn’t you know it, that is exactly what he did for the birdie, four points and one of the nine that we managed as a group for the day. Two bogies on the rest of the back resulted in a one over for the nine and a net 60 for the round. Farewell to a handicap of seventeen.
Gordon came in bewailing the number of putts that he had missed that prevented him from producing a better score. When he totted up the number that he reckoned he missed, he still wouldn’t have beaten Brent, and so he was happy that he hadn’t come second with net 61 instead of net 67. And while on the subject of missed putts, el Presidente seemed to be claiming that he had missed about 20 par putts, and that didn’t include the holes that included double figures and fat ladies on the card. At least he could console himself with the fact that he didn’t rack up any frothies today. Bob’s day was both good and bad. The good was that his cart made it around without incident, although he now reckons it is harder work than using a push cart. The bad was that he managed an airie during the round.
Ben decided that he should leave his driver in the bag as he was hitting his hybrid 180m and straight. Sounds like a good, if not cunning, plan. He almost had conniptions on the 12th where his ball flew straight for, and hit the pin. Unfortunately, it didn’t drop in and actually bounced back several metres to be in contention for the first BallPin. Unfortunately, Rob was able to make use of the Priems shot shape to halve that distance to take out the prize for that hole. He sank the putt for the birdie. The upshot of all this is that Ben came in with his favourite number to take out third place for the day.
Just a shot further back, we find a pair of likely types in Porks and Brent(R) who took a share in fourth place. Porks was taking a bit of a ribbing from SOS and Pepsi as they deemed that he was taking too much time over his approach (second) shot to the 14th green from about 12m out. They were rather shame-faced when he proceeded to put it into the hole for an eagle and, in so doing, he ripped eight eggs out from under the nesting eagle. The eagle is reported to be inconsolable. Brent was a bit scratchy on the front nine, but he managed fours on seven of the nine holes on the back. His drive on the 16th went high wide and handsome to finish well out onto the 14th fairway, but, unperturbed, he lofted it over the trees and onto the green to keep the run of fours going with a couple of putts. Stan, the Man, ended up in 5th place with his 71 after CJP mistakenly submitted both cards to us but, unfortunately, his inside card doesn’t count for our competition. While on the subject of CJ, he was resplendent in a brand-new hat today that he reckons he needs to preserve his delicate skin. Also, he went close to being penalised for playing from the blue markers on the 14th hole. The saving grace was that the blues were further back than the whites and were probably (just) within the allowed two club-lengths.
The second BallPin was, as usual, on the 18th green. The pin was on the bottom deck and Porks put his tee shot onto the top deck and, being first on, he was eligible to put his name on the chit. His first putt did not get off the top deck, and another three were required to finally hole out. It didn’t really matter, though, as nobody else got onto the green, and he still got the ball despite the score and the four putts. The story was a bit better on the 15th, where his tee shot finished 4.34m from the pin, and that was more than enough to take out the ProPin.
The birthday wishes for Bob last week were just a little premature, as it is this week that the big day comes around. The other big event coming up for Bob will be his 900th game with the Club next time he plays. The other birthday celebrant this week will be Brent(R). Have a good one, guys, and don’t drink too much champagne.
Harry was a bit erratic with his third shot to the 13th green and the ball bounced on the path, and he didn’t see where it finished. Directions were a bit vague from his playing partners, but there was a ball perched halfway up the steep slope on the far side of the path. A couple of shots saw the ball on the green when it was discovered to be the wrong ball. The exercise was repeated with the correct ball and the resulting eight made the round only marginally worse than it had been all day. Keith was being touted as the new ‘old reliable’ last week, but it seems that he was rather less reliable today, and missed a number of putts from close range (reportedly as little as 25mm, but the dobbers might have been exaggerating). Bob reckoned that he had been out-effed by Pepsi, but we only have his word for that.
Results for Saturday, 05 February 2022
1st Brent Loeskow (60) 2nd Gordon Hill (67) 3rd Ben Akdag (69) 4th Ryan Porker (70) 4th Brent Rowley (70) 5th Stan Blackshaw (71)
Seniors Results: 1st Gordon Hill (67) 2nd Stan Blackshaw (71) 3rd Chris Priems (72)
Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin – 15th Ryan Porker BallPin No 1 – 12th Robert Priems BallPin No 2 – 18th Ryan Porker
Eagle’s Nest Results: Eagle – 14th Ryan Porker