Firstly a small apology to Rob, Jim and Peter for bastardising their memorable song line but I am sure they would forgive me if they too had been subject to Chrispy flashing his butt like an alpha baboon on the African savannah. How many of the nineteen other members present were treated to the show is uncertain but, hopefully, there will be no long term psychological damage for those that were. Fortunately, the heatwave conditions of the last couple of days had receded or passed on to other areas and conditions were just about ideal for some good golf to be played.
And there, absolutely, was some good golf to be played. The man who made the best of it was none other than Stefan who managed to par the course on his way to taking out the day with plus six score-line. The bottom line could have been even better with a couple of minuses on the card but a total of 5 birdies was the icing on the cake and contributed to the total of fifteen the the whole crew managed. Simon was getting a bit of a complex as Stef drove green after green such as the 9th and the 11th and usually while Simon was in mid-stroke. One plan is to shorten Stef’s clubs to try to bring him back to the length of the course.
On the first tee, Allan was heard to complain about the fact that he had been cut by four strokes as a result of his win last week. The handicapper felt only the slightest pangs of remorse and the lack of sympathy proved to be well founded because Blitzkreig Davies put his head down and got his wedge working to chip in on two of the par threes for birdie on the way to finishing only a point behind Stef with +5 points. The exhilaration must have gone to his head as he managed to drive off after the game without his manbag that contained his multitude of specs and credit cards. Fortunately, it didn’t contain his phone and he took a call before he got too far down the road to come back to the course and pick it up.
Rod has been doing it a bit tough in recent times but he has been persuaded to trade his old driver for something just a little more up-to-date. After a bit of a false start with the first recommendation, he tried and liked an alternate brand. It looks to have worked some sort of magic as he presented with a very respectable plus three. Although the driver might have helped, apparently it was his chipping and putting that made the really big difference. Just adds to the justification for the statement that you drive for show but you chip and putt for dough (or at least points).
Si was probably a bit off balance due to his self-repaired denture which had a rather disconcerting habit of getting out of sync with his jaw. A properly constructed replacement obviously settled him down (either that or the e-cig did) and he gathered a placing with his card of plus two. He certainly seemed happier in himself than he did last Thursday. After shocking half of the club before tee time Chrispy was relieved to find that his carry bag didn’t impinge on the delicate part of his anatomy. He had spent several hours down in the park working on a solution to the ‘shanks’ which he reported had been successful. And so it was that he was able to present with a square card at the end of the day with not a shank in sight other than those below his rather fetching shorts. Chris was joined on the podium by John, Dale and the ‘arithmetic kid’ MattH (or maybe Rob was the culprit).
Ryan’s score today is probably better not mentioned. But he did manage a couple of reasonable shots After one such, which gave him the chance of an eagle, he promised his playing companions a share of the booty if he managed to sink the putt. He didn’t manage it, but, when there were three on the 17th green from the tee, the promise was re-activated and, wouldn’t you know it, this time the putt rolled in and the Eagle’s Nest was laid bare in one fell swoop. And so, a rather bemused, SOS was handing out balls to multiple ‘winners’. He was also handing out largesse to multiple winners for the Double jackpot on the 15th hole ProPin after Stef (who else) put his ball to 1.24m after agreeing to a team split. The BallPin was on the 4th and Joe was the one who shut out a couple of others to take the prize. The 18th pin was on the top deck which seems to make the task just that little bit more difficult and so there will be a Jackpot on that hole for next week. Nothing like some extra money to keep you interested.
The Birthday Birdie dozed off last week and forgot to send wishes to Rob and SteveK. Hope it was a good one chaps. This week the party boys are Keith and Jason. Just keep thinking of it as one step closer to playing your age and keep on swinging (your clubs of course).
Things got a bit draughtie out on the course today even though there was little in the way of wind (we won’t mention John on the 1st). Targe tried to dispute his as he reckoned that the ball was well past the red markers before it hit a tree and came back into the swamp in front of the second tee. On the very same hole, MattN attacked the swamp from the tee side and came out of the battle the worse of it. Rob, on the other hand, waited until the third hole before contributing to his playing groups drinking problem by not making it to the reds.
SOS was a bit worried that he might have to flash his ‘Freddie’ after a fairly warm exchange between players from adjacent fairways and the 10th tee group as to who had the right of way. Chrispy, for one, was volunteering to exchange sexual favours over the matter. Noodles spent a reasonable amount of time on the practice putting green before the tee time but perhaps that time would have been better spent on the driving range if the accuracy of some of his drives was any guide. He was noticed gripping his club pretty tightly on a couple of occasions and as a result the resolution is still holding.
Joe sprayed his drive from the 5th more than somewhat and finished behind the pond by the 8th tee where he was left with little option but to chip it back into the open and further from the green. He then proceeded to pitch it onto the green and into the hole for a birdie. That would just about have to beat spectacular drives any day and at least the head stayed on the club.
Simon misplaced his expensive sunnies last week but, not to worry, Gordo found them, picked them up and messaged Si that he had them. So, Si was a bit perplexed when he got a call saying that they had been found (undamaged) on the road in the entrance to the car park. It seems Gordo put them on the roof of his trusty vehicle and promptly forget about them and they were deposited where they were re-found as he headed out of the car park. Simon couldn’t wait to front Gordon and ask where his sunglasses were.
The AGM is coming up in March and, as is normal, all Committee positions are up for contest. If you have a yen to contribute more to the Club, then find yourself a sponsor and a seconder and get your nomination in. The Forms are available on the website. In actual fact, there is lots of interesting stuff on the website if you only take the chance to explore the menus and have a read. Not mentioning any names but a newspaper editor would be a bit upset if nobody read his little rag.
The Matchplay Championship is coming up again and the cut-off for seeding will be the 24th February with the first round starting the next week. The Matchplay Registration Form is open and it would be appreciated that, if you do not want to be included in the draw, you indicate that wish by using the form. Otherwise all active and eligible members will be seeded based on their scores for their three most recent rounds played in competition. The detailed rules are on the website but, in essence, if you and your opponent are present on any day within the period of the round, you must play. Also, if no result is reported by the end of the last day of the round, both parties are eliminated.
Results for Saturday, 20 January 2018
1st Stefan Belevski(+6) 2nd Allan Davies(+5) 3rd Rod Grant(+3) 4th Simon Powell(+2) 5th Matt Hunt(□) 5th Chris Priems(□) 5th John Quinlan(□) 5th Dale Webb(□)
Seniors Results: 1st Allan Davies (+5) 2nd Rod Grant (+3) 3rd Simon Powell (+2)
Nearest the Pin Results: ProPin No 1 15th Stefan Belevski ProPin No 2 18th Jackpot BallPin 4th Joe Wagenecht
Eagle’s nest Results: Eagle 17th Ryan Porker